the changes we made to heal
by bluenovember10
Summary: when the cullens moved to forks all jasper expected was the same old story, but this time it was different. who was this mysterious november and what was she hidding? was she really who she said she was? and why was he drawn to her?
1. prologue

**A/N: Hello to everyone reading this, I know it's been a while since my last update, please forgive me for the slowness but I went back to school early this year and have had serious writers block ever since. So I decide to try going back to the start and seeing if that helped (due to a friend pointing it out). From this I then wrote this prologue maybe it will clear up some confusion that I know has been present. Please bear with for the next chapter it is coming and I now have a few ideas **

**Prologue-The begins of November**

Everything in my life changed that day, that year. It was the fight that changed all of the paths we were on it changed the way things should have been. How could this have happened was fate really being this cruel? To loses everything, a home, a family… the person who you loved. How do you cope when the very things that used to hold you up and help you suddenly turn against you? How do you let someone in again when everything you ever did was used against you? Could I trust again? All I knew was that it was time to move again to keep myself safe time to pose in that same old role again until nothing but that happened. The constant flow of guilt. Oh how the never ending guilt never left, I let this happen, I let this change me, and I let HIM change me. Never again. Here I was back in front of the school of one of the most out of way places I could find, where only two people in all the world knew where I was and even then I didn't trust them with my address, luckily for me I changed the name on the deed to someone they don't know. But what if for once I could just trust again what if for once I could let go of the old path that fate had set out for me and follow this new one. I hope to god that this new path leads me to be a better person than before.


	2. Chapter 1 the meeting

**hi, i would just like to say that this is my own plot and that i have changed things up a bit. i know i said it was bella but i've kinda re-invented her, so just bear with. could you also keep in mind this is my first fan fic so go easy and give me chance ! :)**

Chapter one-The Meeting

NPOV

Everything was as it should be up until that battle, after that nothing was the same. Every time I tried to help my family get over it the more difficult it became. He and I argued to the point where the family sided with him and I was pushed out. From then on I have been on my own, moving from town to town. I never settle anywhere for long until now….

I stared down at my book, god how I just wanted the day to be over, how much more of this would I have to take? The hole in my chest felt bigger with every step I took. Not only was there that but now I had to deal with my powers increasing, oh well, I gotta just deal with this. Just then this new kid walked into the class room, that's odd, I should have seen this happening. Why didn't I, could my powers be fading there were so many questions running through my head I forgot I had the only open seat next to me. Next thing I know, the teacher is telling him to sit down next to me.

He walks over cautiously I would say, how can a vampire be here in this school! GOD could I not go anywhere without them following me! My anxiety levels increased, and with that my powers, suddenly I couldn't block it anymore, all the feelings, all the thoughts, pierced me like a knife as I lost control of my powers briefly. I couldn't cope, I felt like screaming, I was just about to, I could feel the blackness taking over me when I felt a wave of calm go around the room. This was impossible, I didn't do that! Just then he sat down next to me.

"Hi there" he said with the familiar Texan drawl, oh God not someone who knew those bloody brothers, I just couldn't take that. "My name is Jasper Hale, what's yours?" As he talked I studied him, it was easy for me to do two things at once. the emotion from everyone behind me, doubling as time slowly continued, I grimaced.

"It's November" I didn't give him any more information than that.

I turned to the board and put my headphones in, luckily for me I had a spell cast on them so they were invisible to humans, it's not like I won't hear the whole lesson anyway. I hear a sigh from next to me and feel like a complete cow, here he was trying to be nice, but I couldn't risk anyone finding out my real name because that would mean the end for me.

JPOV

god could this get any worse, first when we move here i have to enter into high school, now i get stared at all the time.i know the rutine but it still bugs me now matter how many times did we have to do this. all my siblings were now only one or two class with me. it had gotten hard this time around what with me and alice spliting up. well at least she was happy now, that was all that mattered. oh well time for the last class of the day english literature. oh joy.

i walked in and handed the slip to the teacher, the emtions in the rooms were over wealming. i was starting to block them all and walk to the seat the teacher pointed to. this was odd i felt nothing coming of this girl nothing at all. maybe my block was working too well but i should still deel ther persons next to me's feelings. in the intrest of being polite and interacting with humans i intorduced my self, maybe if i talked to her i could gage this girls emotions.

"hi there" i said in my best texan drall an the most welcoming smile i could make, she frowned and then went pale "my name is jasper hale, whats yours?" she studied me really hard while i talked, i saw her grimance at the same time i started to feel eveyones emotions it took all mhy will power not to grimance. then i suddenly felt it all double most of it coming from the girl next to me.

she sighed unconcously, "It's November" she said in a really sharp and exasperated that she fiddled with a pair of headphones and turned to the board. how the hell was she going to hear the lesson exactly with the loudness of her music. i was really surprised that she wasn't getting glares from anyone or asked by the teacher to turn it down. she was a mystery this one oh well i sighed. she seemed to be lost in thought all the way through class but could answer each of the teachers questions without a problem. well that just was plain curious. who was this girl and why was there no emotion coming from her?..

**just bear with me and the story, i promise there was a reason why the characters where introduced this way. I'm new to all this as i said before so any comments would be welcome.**


	3. Chapter 2 blacking out

**sorry for the delay with the chapter i had writers block, hopefull won't be long untill the next one :)**

**I would just like to say a big thank you to one of my best friends for always being there for me and reading through my stuff even if she doesn't like the topic . I would also like to say thank you to those that get me to put my stuff up here i.e. my parents :p**

Jaspers point of view

The girl intrigued me throughout the whole of the day. I felt no emotions coming off her no matter what. How this possible then was there was the way she never got caught with her music on. I'd heard about this from my other siblings but this was just ridicules.

We all met up at the end of the day to drive home. They were all deciding who would go home with whom since me and Edward drove us to school today. I ended up the rose and Emmet in the back of the car while Edward went home with Alice. The emotions both pairs were emitting were enough to make me feel worried and I knew that Alice and Edward would go for a hunt to get distracted. I told Emmet and rose to get in the back and get a control over them.

I got so lost in my thoughts of who this girl was and how she had no emotions that I didn't feel the lust until it hit too much level I so did not need those kind of emotions coming from my 'siblings'. so i sent them a wave of calm, it didn't work.

"oi you two love birds in the back! get your emotions under control now or you will regret it!" i growled at them. sometimes i really hate being a damn empath.i heared emmet growl and then realsie they were in my car he mutter some explitives about that while rosalie just grined.

"sorry jasper, but you know we just can't help it sometimes" rose said in the most innocent voice she could. i justed sighed. luckily for me we had reached the house. i heard a sqeal of joy as emmet whisked rose off thank god.

i sighedd and stayed in the car trying to figure out who the hell this girl was and what the hell she was. no-one and i mean no-one gave off no emtions when they were then i felt something from over the side of town so strong it made me want to weep and cry. instead i just remained stock still not moving or talking then everything went black...

"what happened to him?" i heard someone ask in a calm tone although the person was panicked i groaned. "jasper son can you hear me?" ahh of course it was carlisle he was as ever the calm doctor. i opened my eyes and saw all my family gathered around my car, all with panick and worry in the features and emtions.

"yeah i can hear you. beofre you ask no i don't know what happend. wait shouldn't you be at work till 6?" i asked solwy getting out the car. he looked even more worried now and shared a look with edward.

_get out of my head eddie _i yelled in my head i didn't need him poking around in my memories or my thoughts at this procise moment in time.

"soz" he mumbled, carlisle just sighed "he was poking around in your head because im worried and need to know the last thing that happend to you" carlisle was looking more worried by the second.

"still not answering my question carlisle?" i sated as i walked to the house honstly from the way they were all acting you'd think i'd past out for hours or something. then i heard a gasp come from alice then all these differnt emtions at once. i was by her side in a second placing my hands on her arm in an effort to calm her.

"whats wrong?" my worry levels now increase, "you really don't know the time do you?" she says pointing to the sky clearly wanting to aviod talking about the vision, to anyone apparently acording to edwards reaction and emtions. i slowly look up and see it's night now. but wasn't it daytime just a few moments ago?

"what the hell? Oh God not again" the emtions are coming back again and before i can do anything to block them i feel my self fall the everything goes black...

**a/n: thank you to all those that have looked at my work and hung on in there with the story so far. reveiws would be great, would love to hear all your opinons and thoughts on what you think might happen :)**


	4. Chapter 3 Guilt

**To everyone who has read my work i would like to say thank you. Once again i would like to say a huge thank you to my family and friends. You support me through everything so this is all happening because of you.**

Npov (November's point of view)

I only just made it through the rest of the day. What with all the emotions going on and the hole in my chest I just couldn't hold it anymore. I raced back to my apartment most of the people in this town think I live with my parents but I don't. I haven't seen the people that were supposedly my family for years; it hurts too much to even think about why. But I had other people now

"I'm home" I call out to the empty house; I still don't live with those people either at the minute we're trying to find a safe way for us all to be here. But it is so difficult what with all the problems that arise around us. Just then I start to let my walls down.

I hear all the conversations and emotions going on inside my apartment building and just break down. My powers come out with full force as the memories engulfed me as the emotions take me under and into the black…

_*Flash back*_

_I'd just been out with all the girls trying once again to create some sort of normality that had escaped us all since that fatal day. Sighing deeply and pushing away the thoughts of happier time before that day i came to our set of rooms that we all shared. I said the password to get in and pushed open the door. The sight that greeted me shocked me to my core..._

_There he was lounging on the settee surrounded by all the family photos we had all taken together. The only difference now was the fact that i had red words written all over me in the photos no doubt the work of some kind of magic. I released a strangled sound as i took in his pure hatred of me. His head snapped up with the sound and his express moved from one of hurt and longing to pure hatred._

_I took a step towards him and say his name. His look transforms again at first i think this is all a mistake and he didn't do it. But then i realise that his sister and her partner had come in behind me._

_'What the... what in Apolls name happened here' she yells, as her partner holds her to him to calm her. He looks guilty for just the slightest of the second before he spins a tale once again.' i don't know. When i came down here to head out i found all the albums out and with this already done. Every time i tried to undo the spell cast on them it just strengthens' he said in the most innocent voice he could manage, sounding just enough hurt in the right place. He looks at me 'guess someone has it out for you love' they think he is being sincere but after all i have seen i know this is all just an act._

_'i guess they do' i try to remain as calm as possible while i turn to her and her partner 'can you two give us some time to talk about how to handle this?' i ask worry in my voice i just want this all to end and us to be back to how we were. But even i know now that no matter what i say or do nothing will ever be the same again that there is nothing to change him. I should have done as he asked me all those years ago..._

_'Sure we'll err give you some room. if you're sure you're going to be okay Bella?' he said that's what i love about her partner we both started in a similar position and are basically brother and sister, here's hoping that the vision i had doesn't come true i don't think i could survive that. I can already feel emotions so i know it is just a matter of time now._

_'Yeah, I'll be fine' i try to repress the shudder trying to work its way through my body but it's hard. I'm sure he knows about the arguments we have been having but he stays silent, trying to give us our space to sort out the issues never telling me out right he knows._

_They just nod and head out. I turn to look at him again, once again his face shows his true hatred but what he doesn't know is that I can feel the hatred coming off him as well now. 'So why this time, why not just tell them how you really feel?'_

_'Cause if I did that they'd take your side and you don't deserve any sympathy it's your entire fault that their gone!' he yells at me stepping closer and closer. I will not move and show my fear._

_'But it's not! We all played a role. We all could have done things differently! If we had just done as we had planned none of this would have happened. What about you? Will you not see your part in all this and the aftermath?'_

_'Me I don't have the powers you do you could have just saved them! As for the aftermath' he trailed off and laughed 'well let's just say I've seen the light' at this he rolled up this sleeve and I saw it the marking that meant the end._

_'Why' I asked physical feeling the pain of this final betrayal. I knew the answer and how things would be now._

_'Because love this is where I belong now, where I have always belonged' he spat._

_I brought my self-back from the black abyss of pain that I was heading into. I knew how that memory ended. I knew what happened next all the arguments that followed and my eventual and gradual push out of the place I called home. The loss of the family that we had all became. It hurt too much to even remember the names of those people. Not even the ones I thought I could count on stayed friends with me or stuck up for me. If only I had kept my promise…the pain would be less now._

_Just then I got a text from one of my oldest friends who had given me a safe haven, of course that had caused problems itself. _

_Nov Hun r u okay I have a feelin that somats up but I can't place it-m_

_Yeah I just got lost in my memories-n_

_Okay Hun if Ur sure, we can all try to make a trip to u?-m_

_NO, don't it's only make things worse for you and me-n_

_Kk Hun tries not to get too lost again we're always here for u-m_

_I smiled at the thought and then started to panic I remember when someone else said that. No don't go there, I told my mind it's only make things worse. I got up and put my iPod on shuffle, just as the phone rang. There were only two people in this whole world that knew the home phone number. _

_'Ello how's you cupcake' said this voice on the end of the phone in a really bad fake English accent._

_'I'm good Petety-weety, how's Char and please stop with the English accent it really does not work' laughing at the image the bad accent always conjures up, two vampires in their ranch house wearing old fashioned English clothes from the late 1900's. Pretending to drink tea._

_'she's good, I'm getting better at it, anyway not the point I had a feelin you're in trouble cupcake and…well the rest is for you to figure out' he said the last part so low and fast that I almost couldn't hear it. Guess all my years training came in handy._

_'I'm fine just too lost in the memories Peter, look I better go I talk with you tomorrow, I have some questions for you.'_

_He started to respond but I cut him off and told him I had to get something to eat._

_Just then I started to remember the argument that made me leave and all my family from there and other places abandoned me. This time instead of falling into the memories I just let the emotions from the apartment and all the thoughts distract me until my body could not take anymore and I passed out cold welcoming the abysses blackness and emptiness._

_**Sorry it's so long but the flash back is important. At the minute I'm in York so I might not be able to post the next one so soon. Please review and tell me what you think. I like hearing your lots thoughts .**__**  
**_

_**i would also like to say that it may take me a while to write the next chapter as school starts again soon and im losing hope with this story so please bare with. **_


	5. Chapter 4 pain

**hey guys i know it has been a while since my last update and for all those who have been waiting i am really sorry. i have been having some trouble with my english literature work in school and it has led to a serious amount of writers block. hopefully things are getting better meaning that i will be updateing more regularly. i will however warn you now i have exams and retakes coming up so please be patient with me**

Chapter four: Pain

I walked the school halls, not really paying attention to where I was going, I was just trying to find a quiet place to go. it's not often I don't want to be around people and their emotions, but after last night and what happened… Well I wasn't in the mood to feel all these stupid and annoying teenagers' emotions.

We had all spent the rest of the night trying to figure out what all this meant. We even went out to find what that idiot, Peter told us to. "Hmph. Scaring a friend, yeah right" I muttered under my breath. Then suddenly it hit me. A complete emotional blackness, it was almost peaceful. But most of all, it was nerve racking as hell. I looked around to locate the only person I knew who could do that, because if they were here, we were in trouble and gone. But I couldn't find them.

" _What the hell dude!? I think that we have a BIG problem here Edward." _I sent my thoughts on everything that just happened towards my brother. Hopefully he would pick up on their minds and we could know why they are here.

"Calm down Jasper, there's no-one else here we checked all over the town and Alice would have picked up on it" there was no panic in his voice at all.

"_So glad you can be calm right now"_ I growled back. Thank god for Edward's power, because I think if I had to hold a conversation today, it would go horribly. Mind you, he was doing me a favour, he hated to use his power, he thinks it is an invasion of privacy so he blocks it unless any of us send our thoughts his way. I never thought that his power would ever be more useful than it was today, the only other time it was, was in a battle. That's when I spotted her here; the other day when we first met, I felt nothing at all. Maybe this was her, but maybe it was best just to leave her alone. She looked so alone and heartbroken though, what had she gone through to make her like that, like she wanted to hide from the world? I hear a quiet chuckle from over the classroom, I guess Edward thought my thoughts were funny.

"It's not that they were funny, just familiar to what everyone goes through at some point." he whispered, but I guess he was musing aloud again, but at least he was still trying to be open about his thoughts. That's the other thing I like about Edward he won't only use his powers when it's a dire situation, he always allows us to hear his thoughts. I guess he figures it's a give and take, a full disclosure thing.

"_What's that meant to mean old man?"_ he sends, the way he was being evasive implied something, that made me worry. Just as he started to respond I felt something change, so I shushed him, ears concentrating as if to hear something. That's when I started to feel it, just that little bit of emotion coming from her before she started to cry, and then just as it came, it was gone. It reminds me so much of last night, the pull I'd been feeling since we got here increased tenfold.

_*flash back*_

"JASPER! JASPER!" Someone was shouting my name but it sounded so far off.  
All I wanted to do was curl up into a ball, because these never ending emotions were killing me.

"He's non-responsive; I don't know what else to do, if we don't pull him out soon…well, I dread to think what it could mean" Carlisle was who had been shouting, but now he sounded so worried and exasperated, it hurt me even more. I let out a whimper and curled up into foetal position, I have been with my gift for nearly a hundred years but before now, it hadn't manifested itself as a physical pain.

"He's going to come out of it, but I can't see how or when. I also don't think it's because of anything we do, Carlisle. It's more like someone else decides something which influences this, but it's all too blurry." Alice says, her voice sounding exasperated. Just then I felt my phone vibrating, heard Peter's ringtone 'We got everything' it suited him so well. I felt someone pry my hands from my legs so they could get to my phone.

"Peter! What the hell do you know about this!?" Rose screeched, I guess that's who had reached my phone.

"Well, my dear, I know a lot more than you people, even with Miss Pixie on your side" He was being such an idiot, taunting my family again.

"Well, can you tell us something then!? This is the second time this has happened!" Esme seemed on the verge of a breakdown, I kept trying to send her calming emotions but there was too much pain and hurt, all I ended up doing was making it worse. I heard her cry out, a gust of wind breezing against my skin as Carlisle ran to his wife.

"look, all of this? I cant reveal too much, it's not my place. Your just going have to give me a minute to think about what I _can_ reveal." Peter was stressing about this, I knew, but everyone else did too, they sighed, exasperation evident.

"Fine." Everyone but Carlisle snapped, they only did it out of concern this happening to a vampire was just unheard of.

"Peter it is fine we understand that you cant tell us because of other factors just give us the information we need and no more" Carlisle said softly trying once again to calm the whole situation down.

"Right Char's just text me and told me what to say, basically all of this is coming from one person but you need to figure out who, and by the way you lot have trouble, you are scaring a very good friend of ours with your vampiness, turn it down!"he yelled the last part, by this point the pain was gone, I jumped up and snatched the phone from rose.

"Who the hell is this coming from peter because they are in danger if they feel like this all the time!" I was angry now and I didn't know why this was not like me, I knew this feeling it was the ones all mated vampires have when their mate is in danger or threatened.

"Calm down major, they don't feel like this all the time, and like I said YOU have to figure it out, look for...oddities" with that the phone clicked.

_*end flash back*_

Here standing in front of me was the only oddity in the town and the pull that we all feel eventually. No it couldn't be, this couldn't be happening it couldn't be her, she couldn't stand that much pain, it was wrong she was meant to be cherished. As soon as I thought all that I knew I was in trouble. But she shouldn't feel this it just wasn't right, I took a step deliberately toward her and she backed away, she looked up at me like she sensed my presence there was fear in her eyes. No it couldn't be, she couldn't be...

**once again thank you to all who read and leave reviews. i will be grateful to hear all your thoughts on this chapter and any to come. if you have any questions leave them as a review and ill get back to you soon. thank you all so much November**


	6. authors note

Hi guys

I'm sorry I have not posted in a while, but Iv'e been busy with school. Due to how things are going at the minuet I have no work typed up to post due to this I will be putting my work on hold for a while I do not know how long. I hope to have a few new chapters typed up soon, this will help me keep ahead but as life always seems to throw me a curve ball that stops my writing so I will be abandoning my posting schedule as it never seems to stick. I hope u all stick with me and just give me time.

Sorry blue november


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